Mind Over Matter
by Faitily-Yours
Summary: Frank's in love with Gerard. One night he decides to tell Gerard after years of hidden love. Only to walk in on the most horrific scene in the world pushing Frank's mind back to when he was five years old. Ferard/Frerard/Frikey
1. Chapter 1

Frank Iero was like any other man who had succeeded in life, only so full of life and love. He became close to those he was with and became farther away from those who weren't always there. For instance; his wife. It seemed to him that life could go on without her, however life could not go on without one certain band mate. You see Frank was the guitarist for a certain band that had become vey close during the years they spent on the road.

My Chemical Romance.

And in their close proximity he fell in love. He didn't mean to and he even refused to believe his own heart and marry the girl of some other guys dreams. She was amazing, supportive and even helped with his ambitions. But this band mate? He was extraordinary. He created the ideas of saving the world, he set up and put out ideas and suggestions to save millions. He _did_ save millions. And that's what this was all about.

Frank only thought about looking up to this man as his hero, and the man he idled and held tight. But that's were it became even harder. He wanted to hold this man, tell him what he has done to save the world and millions of young teens. To explain the essence of his being, every perfect feature of his flawless face and body. He wanted to love and show this man love like no _woman_ ever could.

It had been three years since this feeling was accepted and taken into the box of secrets that Frank had kept deep down. Three years of watching and waiting for him to dump his latest girlfriend into the ditch. However when that day didn't come he began to worry.

Lines of a loved feeling gone wrong etched into his forehead. Plans mislead and a life so wanted fell missing. Large blue rings around his eyes showed everyone that something was not right.

A certain cornering from Mikey sent Frank over the edge.

"I think I love him Mikey!...He... he's just so wonderful and I just can't give up now...Its not over...right?" Frank had gathered himself into a small ball on the floor of his dressing room. Mikey walked over and wrapped his arms around him, he wanted to help the younger man so much, it was hard for Mikey to hold back his tears.

"I know...I think you should talk to him." Frank's head shot up.

"Are you crazy?"

"No...I'm not. I think you should tell him before he does something drastic, like asking for marriage." The two said nothing while Frank pondered over his options.

Mikey was the smartest person to talk to about this, he was in fact Frank's obsession's brother. This meant that he knew the most about his brother's feelings. He had to get there before the newest bitch was offered a life time with the most perfect man one could ask for.

"Okay. I'll go now." Frank stood up and wiped off the last tear he would lose over Gerard.

Gerard.

That name was perfect even in his mind. It rolled over other thoughts and placed itself in front of everything. A smile presented itself onto Frank's face and he knew what he had to do.

He skipped lightly down the hallway, whipping away old tears, until he ran into Ray near the water jug.

"Toro, where's Gerard?" Frank asked without stopping but just slowing down and hoping in place.

"Bus, dude, off the caffeine for the night, ya?" Frank grinned.

"Thanks, and sure thing!" Frank hopped back around and started on his way to the bus. Upon nearing it, after dodging quite a few fans on the way, he sensed something odd about the vehicle. It was tall and long, its shiny exterior always gave it an off-limits feel to keep away wandering fans. However tonight it seemed to want to keep Frank away. The short man shook away the feeling and jumped in front of the door. He knocked to be polite, who knows if Gerard had brought his latest lover in there for a little fun on the couch?

He waited a couple moments and when nothing came he opened the door, peaking inside. A wide grin showered his face when he realized that Gerard was alone and just resting.

"Gerard?" It was dark, and it was for the better; however frank did not know what lay beneath the darkness so he clicked on the light and allowed light to flow over everything.

It was a mess.

His grin immediately slid off his face.

The whole living area and kitchen that was combined was a disaster. Items were thrown everywhere; nothing seemed to have escaped the tornado that had probably gone through there. However that was not what had caught his eye the most, the fact that almost ever square inch of the bus was simply covered in red, deep crimson red. If Frank had wanted he could of ignored it and walked back out but the distinct smell of alcohol and blood filled his nose, the sight of red showered his sight, the taste of metallic blood and salty tears drowned him. But what was most confusing was that the more he stood there he couldn't for the life of him figure out why he heard screaming.

He dropped to his knees and balled his hair in his hands. His eyes scanned over everything, looking for _anything_ that was not covered in the now drying blood. But nothing popped out. In fact, it was to overwhelming for Frank.

_Where was Gerard? This could possibly be... Was it Gerard? No...it couldn't be. There was way too much blood for it to be his. Because Gerard couldn't possible be dead. Could he?_

Thoughts of Gerard's death overcame Frank's consciousness and the screams ringing in his ears became louder. This time they were accompanied with 'no', 'i love you', and 'please oh god no'. He wasn't sure but he defiantly recognised the voice.

Thoughts were racing and nothing seemed to slow down. His heart was pounding as he finally saw what was happening. Gerard's blood was coving the walls of the bus.

Gerard's black parade uniform was ripped up and bloodied on the floor.

Gerard's complicated scrawl was written on the small piece of paper on the floor in front of him. Wait. Paper?

It was still covered in blood like everything else, but there were finger prints on it, with messy writing that said _Damn, I love you._in black ink. A small _G_ in the corner adorned with a slightly broken heart.

Frank grabbed it close and bent down so he was sitting on his knees with his head wresting on the bloody floor, arms wrapped under him. The note safely pressed against his chest from other damage.

**---End Chapter 1---**

He didn't know what it meant in fact he didn't know what any of this meant. Surely this was enough blood to kill. How could Frank possibly wait for Gerard? To die?

No. Whatever it did mean he didn't want to know, because he knew it was no good finding out. He just left it at that Gerard had written it before he was brutally stabbed and ripped apart before carted out of the bus. Images of Gerard's pale dead body overcame Frank and he sunk even lower into himself, the screaming becoming louder and louder.

If it weren't for the slapping of feet on stairs and concrete and the slamming of the door against the wall Frank would of never realized the screaming was his own. Ray was immediately by his side while Mikey and Bob watched in horror what surrounded them.

"Frank calm...stop screaming. **SOME ONE GIVE US SOME FUCKING HELP!** Frank what happened?" Frank just shook his head, trying to get into a calmer stage, going back to goo times.

"Ray, lets get him out of here...look at his face." Bob noticed the pale face and the confused glaze to Frank's eyes. The hollow of his soul and heart becoming deeper and deeper as Frank was exposed to the blood red once again. Frank's eyes were wide in shock as ray picked him up bride style to get him off.

"Hey guys, did you figure what was – oh my god. Frank?!? Where's Gerard!?!" Mikey stepped into the bus but froze on the top step.

"Mikey...I'm so sorry...I think...I think the bloods Gerard's." Mikey paled and turned his head quickly before spewing his stomach contents onto the concrete below the steps of the bus.

"Ray, get Frank somewhere safe. I'll get Mikey to safety." Ray nodded and carried Frank to a car. As he set Frank down on the edge of the door of the back seat Frank trembled and tears ran down his face.

"It's okay Frank. I know this is hard but we're going to have to move on. We-", silent tears ran down Ray's cheeks in memory of his best friend came to mind. However he held in the sobs as he tried to stay strong for Frank. He was in much worse of a condition. " have to stay strong for Gerard. He would want that."

Frank looked in Ray's eye a new childish look in them. This confused Ray a lot, I mean Frank was just exposed to the most horrifying thing he could ever see in any horror movie in real life. However now Frank looked like he had no idea who he was, or what he was talking about.

"Gewawd? Can Fwankie be Sooperman strong!?!" He raised his eye level and picked himself up from the car and hopped onto the ground. "I wanna be sooperman!!"

Nothing was going through Ray's mind, yet everything was.

What was happening with Frank? What was he doing? Or even saying?

The ring of ambulances shrill sirens echoed in the distance. As they came closer Frank gave a disgusted look and covered his ears with his hands in a childish way.

"Make it stop! It hurt my ears!" Ray said nothing but gathered the smaller man in his arms held him close.

"Everything will be okay...everything...will be okay..." The taller man spotted Bob walking slightly awkward with Mikey struggling in his arms.

"Let me go Bob!" he was pounding on the stronger man's chest as he cried and screamed to be let free.

When they arrived to where Ray and Frank were Bob let Mikey down next to Frank.

"Hi! I'm Fwank, but u can call me Fwankie, you cute! What's your name?" Frank grabbed Mikey's hand and then pulled him into a hug.

"Umm..Mikey..."

"What's with him?" Ray just shook his head and looked over to Bob. They seemed to be the only strong ones in this situation.

"Want my guess?"

"I want anything I can get." Ray nodded.

"I think...I think it was too much for Frank to handle. When he tried to go to better times or calm down his brain broke down. I think He's stuck as a five year old. I...I think..."

"He was in love with Gerard." Mikey cut in. "He told me before that he was going to go and tell Gerard about his feelings and walk in on..." Mikey gulped down a sob. " Gerard, what the fuck have you done..." The tall man dropped to his knees and let out all his pent up crying. Frank just looked scared and dropped too.

"Mikey! Don't cwy! It will be okay! Fwankie will make things better, would you like a stick? I'll go get you a stick! My mommy always said that when someone is crying you should make them feel better and that way they will be my fwiend! Please don' cwy Mikey..." Frank started to cry too.

**---End Chapter 2---**

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**Hey every one. This is my second Ferard(Frerard) I have written and I hope you like it just as much on here as people on Mibba did =]**

**PLease leave a comment and umm...favorite and everything. I love you all!! 3**

**-Meggy**


	2. Chapter 2

The fire truck and police pulled up at that moment they rush all over the place trying to figure out what happened. An officer then walked up to the four men, his tall stature and strong build made Frank hold Mikey closer than before.

"Hello, I'm Special Agent Gains, may I ask what your relation is to this incident?" Gains pulled out a small notepad and jot down the date.

"I'm Raymond Toro, the blond one is Robert Bryar, the one on the ground in Michael Way and the one holding his....is Franklin Iero. We are all part of the band My Chemical Romance and our bus is the scene." Gains nodded and waved his hand to get him to continue.

Ray stood next to him and explained the scene he walked in on and the reason he went there. He went to explain how he knew the blood was Gerard's because no one else had the key to the bus other than their manager who wasn't touring with them for the week while he took care of his newborn. Ray went through the parts where he carried Frank to where they were and how he suddenly changed like a switch.

That certain part caught Gains' attention and he called a medic over immediately to gather Frank together.

"But I want to hewp Mikey! Mikey needs me!" Frank fought with the medics when they wrapped him in a large grey blanket.

"Common Frankie, do you want to go for a ride in the big white truck?" One medic said.

"Can Mikey come too?" the other smiled.

"Sure."

"Yay!! Did you hear dat! We get to go for a wide!" Mikey stood shakily and nodded his head pulling a fake smile for Frank.

"I'll see you guys later I guess..." Ray and Bob nodded.

"We'll be on our way to the hospital after this." Mikey nodded back and hopped into the ambulance after a very excited Frank.

~ Timp Lapse~

Frank lay sleep on Mikey's chest as he curled next to the taller man and a stuffed animal the nice nurses gave him for the time he spent there.

Ray and Bob were seated next to the bed the two men shared waiting for any news on Frank's condition and the bus.

Bob had almost fallen asleep when Special Agent Gains walked in. He noticed frank's sleeping form and crept quietly over to Ray and Bob where he tapped their shoulders and motioned for them to come into the hall.

Mikey watched as the two left with promises to tell him later.

Once in the hallway Gains sighed.

"Okay I have Bad news, worse news and ... even worse news. Then I have the icing to the cake of bad news. I'm so sorry guys." Ray shook his head.

"What's the...news." His voice had become so monotone that Bob had to check it was Ray speaking.

"Okay, well we took samples of the blood from the bus and ran it through DNA testing and it was a positive match to Gerard Arthur Way. We made an estimate of how much blood was in the bus and just to be clear there was a lot. Now we would usually have to know how much there was to know if there was any possible hope of the victim being alive however, as you guessed, there was way too much. There is no hope for saving is life, so we sent out a search party for his body. We will keep you updates on the progress.

"We searched the whole bus and could only find the band members fingerprints on everything, as we expected, nothing out of the ordinary. So the killer was smart, not leaving anything but the simple note of the blood telling us he's dead.

"I just got back from the psychiatric ward and talked to Dr. Logan the head. He has taken a special liking into Frank's case, seeing this as a challenge. He has been diagnose with a major case of Mass Lesion. He has no memory of the past twenty three years of his life and has a major personality change if you haven't noticed. His mind has put him in better times, in other words, when he was five. We are going to set up a room and board for him at St. Josephs hospital in the more open area of New Jersey. Dr. Logan has agreed to pay for everything considering his new liking to the case. He will be making regular visits and asks that you visit on a regular basis too, when you can. All the other details will be told to you by Mr. Logan when a car comes to pick you up tomorrow morning to bring you all there to settle him in."

Ray and Bob nodded taking the news in. Things were never going to be the same.

**-----end chapter 3-------**

~six months later~

Mikey was packing a large bag of surprises like he did every other day. He had been coming to visit Frank everyday since his admittance into the building. Today was exactly six months from that fateful day, now however it was a week from Frank's birthday and Mikey wanted to make Frank happy, he deserved it. Sure it hurt watching a grown man crying over a lost love, but it hurt even more when that man had lost his mind and thought he was five years old again. Mikey would sometimes comfort Frank and watch as Frank rambled on about the nice man who died in his dream. How he wished he could help the man and felt bad every time he could get there in time. Sometimes he didn't even know [i]why[/i]he was crying.

Frank didn't even remember who the man was and he was still crying over him. It broke Mikey's heart watching such a sweet boy's heart break even past the barrier.

"Okay Mom, I'm going to go and see Frank." Mikey said as he threw the bag over his shoulder, ready to leave. His mom came out of the kitchen and hugged him goodbye.

"Be safe Michael. You know, you're so sweet visiting him everyday. He's so lucky to have a friend like you. If only Gerard were here to see what's going on. I think it would break his heart."

"I know Mom, lets not talk about him right now. Yes?" She nodded. "Now go take care of Lyn-Z, I'm sure she will change he mind about the food now. She hasn't eaten in a week since you force fed her."

"Of course, my dear, your so thoughtful." She smiled weakly and walked back into the kitchen to grab Gerard's ex-girlfriend's food tray.

"Michael?" Mikey opened the door just as Agent Gains was about to knock on the door.

"Um, hello officer. How can I help you today?"

"We have a major lead that we would like to let you in on, if you would please accompany me."

"As important as that is I have to see Frank today. I'm sure it can wait an hour or two."

"Better yet, we'll bring our lead to you." He pulled up the radio that clung to his shoulder by a strap and pushed the button signalling the men outside. "Lead him in Marcus."

Two men walked up to the Way house. One small with black hair that looked extremely greasy, his face was pale and his cloths look rugged. The one behind him was tall with red hair, he was probably Marcus.

"G-gerard?" The small dark haired man looked up to face his brother.

"Mikey I-" His voice was cut with a hand to his cheek.

"How **dare** you. How fucking **dare you!** Explain yourself **right now!**"

"I couldn't handle the pressure the label was giving me I-"

"You **what **Gerard." Mikey stood tall, boring holes into Gerard's skull. He had no idea what he put Frank through, after two months they said that hope was wearing thin. Frank's mind was shutting down even more, becoming even more childish. However the fear was still evident in Frank's mind. Nothing could come near him if it was sharp, red, or was a bus of any sort.

Since the first day Frank had taken a special liking to Mikey, he didn't know what it was. However whenever he seemed to zone out in their times of relaxation together of the months Mikey would turn back to his friend only to catch Frank staring deeply into his eyes.

He could see the love still hidden beneath the barrier that Frank had set for himself.

"I had to get away."

"I bet you did." Mikey walked away, back towards his only escape lately. Frank.

**---end chapter 4---**

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**Okay guys, seriously, check out my Mibba, it's SO much better on there.**

.com/36835/

**Check it out. I love it, and everything will be so much faster and easier and... everything. You can check out my new stories, I have one-shots up there I have everything. Just, seriously, check it out. I made the switch and LOVED it, I knwo many have switched from here to there as well. They like it much better =]**

**It's prettier too!! 3**

**-Meggy**


	3. Chapter 3

Mikey walked down the familiar hall into the room he new all too well now as Frank's. He thought over the small conversation he had with Gains after he stormed away from his _brother_. Gerard would be staying at St. Josephs for extreme depression, suicidal tendency's, and homicidal thoughts. This was going to be a lot of work. He just could not get over what Gerard had done!

He had left them, and for what, to release the building pressure? He had ruined everyone's live, he had put Bob and Ray into a two bedroom apartment together and Frank into the nuthouse. Mikey was the only one who was seemingly normal, but in reality he had become numb. He didn't feel a thing for Gerard at his 'funeral', nor did he cry along his wife when their dog died. He didn't even try to help his poor, beautiful wife when she miscarried. In stead he left her alone at home and visited Frank.

Frank had been his escape, a way out of things for him. Here was the only place he allowed his mind to even process pain, hurt, sadness, love, guilt, hate, happiness. Gerard had ruined everything, and he was still making it worse! He was supposed to be dead, why can't he stay dead!

He set the bag full of goodies that he had bought Frank on his Superman sheet clad bed, settling himself in the large blue been bag. The look of Frank's bed sheets still made Mikey sigh, all of Superman's red capes had to be coloured over with black to hide the scary colour that reminded Frank of that night.

He waited there a couple moment until the door swung open to reveal Frank in his skeleton costume that he adored. It was Gerard's PJ's until Mikey gave them to Frank, he had hoped that the little reminder would kick start his brain back to normal, unfortunately it just made Frankie think he was a scary skeleton. Mikey cracked a smile at the fond memories he was making with Frank.

"Mikey! Did you bwing me anything?" Mikey got up and grabbed Frank's hand.

"I sure did Frank. But you have to sit down okay?" Frank jumped up and down in place then giggled when he sat down.

"What is it!"

"Be patient Frankie, we talked about this remember?"

"I wemember."

"Good."Mikey grabbed the colour set, including a colouring book and a built in pack of crayons, he had bought for Frank. "ready?"

"Yes!" Mikey brought the items out and showed Frank who jumped out of his seat into Mikey's arms.

"Yay! Just what I wanted! Tank you Mikey! You're the best." A large smile covered Frank's face as he ran over to his small desk and pried open the colours and book.

Mikey had gone through it before he brought it over, colouring over anything that was red and taking all the red crayons out of the pack.

Dr. Logan walked into the room.

"Oh good, Michael."

"Please, call me Mikey."

"Right Mikey. I'm sure you have noticed the small achievement I have made with speech therapy." Mikey nodded, grinning back to the couple of words Frank could say properly again. "We are making process, things might be back to normal in the next year or two. This is a major thing, I know it doesn't seem like much, but it is."

"Thank you doctor, I have something important to tell you." The doctor nodded and turned around to make sure Frank didn't overhear their conversation.

"Some things have come to light on the subject of Gerard's death."

"Oh?"

"Gerard fa-faked his death. He set it up and lye to the whole family to get away from pressure."

Dr. Logan brought his hand to his head and massaged his temple.

"Is Gerard here?"

"He's admitted for Depression and what not." Mikey's monotone voice scared the Dr. Logan.

"It seems that you don't care too much for him anymore. Are you mad? Upset? Relieved?"

"I am...nothing. Frank is all that I have now to look forward to in the future. If he goes away, I have nothing. If Gerard takes that away from me, I will put him back in the grave." Dr. Logan chuckled lightly at the joke he thought Mikey had told only to be shot down with a serious stare back at him.

"I'll be back for Frank in half an hour for his nap." Mikey nodded and the doctor left leaving the two men.

"I'm doing this for you Frankie." Mikey whispered under his breath.

"Hey Mikey, wanna help me with this pretty tree?" Mikey smiled.

"Sure Frank."

**---end chapter 5---**

Gerard felt horrible. He had ruined everything. How could he have listened to that idiot Tom!

Tom was the one he ran into at the bar about two years ago.

~flashback~

One year, he had lasted one year and he was already back to the bar. He sighed and carried himself over to a table in the back. It was a gay bar so there was no chance any crazy fan girl would come up and try o seduce him, he didn't feel like sex tonight. It was five minutes before an incredible hansom man walked over to him.

"What can I get you?" Gerard looked up into the man's red eyes. His pale skin and white hair got Gerard to realize that the red eyes were normal, he was an albino. Gerard just stared at the man, not intrigued by his albino background, but that it just looked so hot on him. He had never thought of [i]anyone[/i] that looked hot. Sure sexy, but never hot. Well, that was a lie, Frank was always on Gerard's mind as hot, sexy, smokin', and fucking amazing but he had to push those thoughts away. He was straight, and now that he thought about it, it was slightly ironic for him to be in a gay bar.

"Jack Daniels please, just bring the bottle." However the man didn't move.

"What's wrong Gerard." Gerard's head shot up.

"What?"

"You know just because you're in a gay bar doesn't mean no one recognizes you. Now tell me. Why are you in this bar, ruining one year of a good sober life?" Gerard sighed.

"They want me...They all want me to be the best thing that ever happened. And yet here I am questioning my sexuality and can't think of anything else! My mind can't stay on one thing long enough to approve the idea before I start thinking about...uh...the guy I think I might like." Gerard blushed and dropped his head to the table. He had never just spilled his guts but he sure as hell thought this was better than drinking it away. Keeping it all locked up didn't do him any good last time, how did he think it would this time?

"Well then get away for a month or so. Figure things out. Relax."

"I can't! They all pull me back in with the 'You're saving people Gerard, we have to get more out there. Let them know you care.' I know I'm helping them, but what about me? I need Gerard time!" He shot his head up and anger boiled behind his eyes.

"Then quit."

"I can't! My fan's will think I gave up on them!"

"Then kill yourself." Gerard was just about to say another 'I can't' when what the guy's message actually went through.

"K-Kill myself? Won't that be like...giving up? Here you are telling me not to drink, but to kill myself?"

"Not literally. What you do is fake it and get away for the time being then come back. Kinda like some killed you, or kidnapped you."

"How the fuck would I do that? Not to mention My family and friends will never forgive me. Not to mention I wouldn't be able to be with the guy I liked! You're not helping!"

"Okay, what you do is you take the maximum amount of blood every week and keep it in storage. If you want I will keep it for you. Then when you're ready to kill yourself off, spray all the blood in a car, or room, or hallway, somewhere. People will find the blood think you're dead then your off scot free! Find a new life, one without stress. Make sure to take money out as if it was normal and keep it somewhere so that when you go you have a whole lot of money." Gerard couldn't believe what he was hearing! This man was crazy.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Tom. Tom Merdoc." He said with a smile.

"Well Tom, fuck you! How could you even suggest that?" And with that Gerard stormed out of the bar thinking about what he said. What if he did? Maybe came back a couple months later and gather up Frank and they could leave together. Live a life without the stress, yet have the money.

It could work, right?

~done~

No. It didn't work, Gerard had to be stupid and waste all his money then be stupid enough to let Tom use his credit card. He should of known he was bad news. Why didn't he ever listen to himself?

**--- End Chapter 6---**

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**Um, haha, Yeah. This is it... I just re-read this thing and I'm like "Oh...wow...that was stupid." Haha I really needed to re-write it before possting it on here xD**

**Oh well...wanna hear a story? this girl read my stories, right, and she's like "I love Gerald and Frank! Ferald is amazing! I don't care what other people say!" and I'm just looking at what she said and going o.O - cus that can't be a spelling mistake, she actually thinks his name is Gerald....but she reads my work and I guess other 'Ferards'.**

**Oh Jeez.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you everyone for the support! Enjoy the new chapter =]**

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Mikey laughed as Frank jumped in his seat when the Scoobie Doo theme song came on.

"SCOOBIE!" Mikey's laughter calmed as he watched Frank lay himself on his stomach and watch the TV intently. His legs lifted and started to fling back and forth as Scoobie Doo and the gang drove up a large road, ready to go to the mountains.

They sat silently while Frank mindlessly hummed to a song. Usually Mikey took no notice to what Frank hummed, considering it was usually something like twinkle twinkle little star or the teapot song. However today he found himself whispering the lyrics of a My Chem song along to Frank's humming.

"....we are...so far from you...burning on, just like a match-." Mikey's head shot up. Frank had never heard that song. They tried to stay away from My Chem songs all together in fact. The first time they tried to get Frank's mind back to normal they played Welcome To The Black Parade to him. Frank broke down in tears, crying about how sad the song was. He cared so much about the man Gerard's voice was singing it about he clung to Mikey, asking him to make it better.

That was the only song they had played for him. Dr. Logan reasoned that it was too early, he needed more time before they tried to bring Gerard into the equation, in any way.

"Frank, where did you hear that song?"

"I didn't. It was in my dweam. A man sang it to me. He was so pwetty Mikey!" Frank stood up, completely forgetting about Scoobie's search for a monster of some sort. "He cuddled up to me like you do and he sang it to me. He said dat he _did_ love me. He was coming back fow me. It sca-wr-ed me at first, but then he had Mikey eyes." Mikey scrunched his brow as he let Frank sit on his lap and cuddle into his chest. "He said dat you would take ca-wr-e of me until you said he could see me."

Mikey was almost at a loss for word. He was worried but at the same time he was proud Frank was trying so hard to pronounce his words like normal.

"What did he look like other than his eyes."

"He was taller dan me and he had black hair and he had white skin and he had Mikey eyes."

"Gerard-" Frank wiggled to get comfier and sighed as he curled into Mikey. "Don't worry Frank, I'll protect you."

"I love you Mikey." Mikey froze. Frank had never said this to him before, however Frank thought he was five. SO this might be slightly normal for a five year old. He had never said it to anyone though, not even his mom or dad, and trust Mikey, he knew. Mikey was beside Frank all day until going home to help his Mom try to feed Lyn-Z and then get his mom into bed. He then would get things ready for the next day, it had become a cycle Mikey had come accustom to. One he started to get used to.

"I...I love you too Frank." Frank smiled and closed his eyes.

Dr. Logan walked into the room just as Frank started to fall asleep.

"O good. I was just about to put him down for a nap. Would you like to visit your brother instead of just watching TV? He's been asking about you." Mikey hesitated before nodding and grabbing Frank in bridal style.

Mikey settled Frank on his queen sized bed and rolled the superman sheets up to his chest. Very carefully he brushed aside a couple strands of hair behind Frank's ear and pecked his forehead.

"Good night Frankie..." He reluctantly walked back over to Dr. Logan and shut the door with care as to not wake Frank.

"Right this way Michael." He started to walk down and out of children's care and into the more serious parts of the hospital. It scared Mikey to know his brother was left in these parts. If this was to cure his depressing, it wouldn't of worked, the halls were too damn depressing.

"Please, call me Mikey."

"Of course Michael." Mikey shook his head in surrender. As they neared a certain room he became more nervous. He could hear yells and screams from behind, a large crash and more screaming. "Here you are. Hope everything goes well. At three we're going to wake Frank, for finger painting and another therapy session, if you want to go back." Mikey nodded and Dr. Logan left. The tall, usually calm, man took a deep nerve calming breath as he took hold of the knob.

Another bang came from inside, "**I HATE MYSELF! HATE HATE HATE! FUCKING WANT TO KILL MYSELF!**" Mikey flinched and opened the door to see his brother tied to the bed. Large straps held Gerard down as he thrashed around. The bangs were from, as Mikey found out, when Gerard would build enough energy to smash the bed backwards against the wall. Nothing was even close to him, an old lamp was broken in the trash and the TV still had a pole sticking out form it. The remote looked smashed to bits on the floor.

"Gerard, what have you done..."

---END CHAPTER 7---

Gerard settled down, his thrashing became just small tugs and pulls on his restrains now and then. He looked Mikey in the eye and allowed tears to fall. Mikey didn't say anything but he grabbed a chair and sat down on it next to Gerard's bed.

"Why was I so stupid ... Why can't I just ever stop hurting people ... I don't get myself." Gerard stated more to himself then to Mikey.

"It's in your nature."

"But it's **not!**" another large thrash that caused him to push the bed back against the wall. Mikey barely flinched, his face blank of any expression. "Where's everyone else...Where's Mom, Dad, Ray, Bob, Lyn-Z, Frankie!" His voice calm at first then louder with each name called.

"Mother and Father are at home. Mom is taking care of Lyn-Z while Dad works all day to make sure we don't become bankrupt. Bob went back to Chicago to mourn his loss. Ray moved in with his girlfriend, he comes around here sometimes to check on Frankie."

"Why is Frankie in here? Is he depressed?"

"No, Frankie is actually very happy. He's happy with the world and me and all the other people that take care of him."

"If he's so flippen happy, why the hell is he in here!?"

"Because Gerard...**When he walked in on **_**your**_** mess his mind let go! In fact it put up a barrier to stop anything else form getting in, to hurt him. YOU'RE "DEATH" CHANGED HIS FUCKING LIFE! FOREVER! AND NOT IN A FUCKING GOOD WAY!**"

"Mikey...Please..."

"NO Gerard...You screwed things up for everyone so now. We're going to screw things up for you."

"You don't mean that-"

"But, don't I Gerard? Have they even told you what's wrong with Frankie?"

"There's something wrong with Frankie? I don't understand, what barrier? "

"Yes. He's sitting in the children's unit right now **thinking he's a fucking five year old! He's having a fucking nap before finger painting!**" Gerard flinched as the information settled in. What had happened in Frankie's mind that would screw him so royally he thought he was five again? Gerard let his head flop back onto the pillows behind him as his thought settled on Frank.

What was Frank to him, why had his 'death' effected him so much?

"What have I done..."

"Good question Gerard. And when you're ready to actually kill yourself tell me. I want to witness, make sure it gets done." Gerard glared at Mikey, however it didn't faze the younger man, he just gazed back.

"Mikey, I want things to be better. I want everything to go back to normal I want-"

"I want world peace, five billion dollars and our old Frankie back. But its too late for that Gerard, it's not going to happen and we all have to deal with it. Wars are going to ensue, I have to get a new job to support all six of us, and Frank is gone. Forever. You're just going to have to live with that guilt." Gerard sat up the best he could to try and get closer to Mikey.

"What if you're lying? How do I know you're not telling me this just so I would go through with a suicide attempt." He stared straight at Mikey to try and break his exterior. However instead of getting the reaction he was hoping for, which was him to spill his lying guts, he got a single tear that ran down his brothers cheek.

"You may be fine with lying about something so serious, Gerard, but I am faithful to my friends and family. I would never lie about someone I love." At then he turned and walked out the door leaving Gerard on his bed to his thoughts.

He should have kept on the little trail he had made that made him think Mikey was lying, but he couldn't. The pain, sorrow and love that filled not only his eyes but that single tear that ran down his porcelain cheek were like another crash in his world. He knew it was real, this was life, it was a hard life that he let happen. Gerard felt pent up anger and agony burst at the seams in his head. He thrashed and pulled, trying to tear open the restraints and grab something to stab himself with. He could feel the bed smashing against the wall as he gave another jolt upwards.

Frank was corrupted.

BANG.

Frank was ruined.

Scream.

And it was all his fault.

"I HATE MYSELF!"

---END CHAPTER 8---


End file.
